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THAT'S ALL FOLKS

FC Buxton have now completed all of their fixtures for the 2011/12 season - we'll be back in August for Pre-season Training.

FRED AND GINGER WALTZ FC TO VICTORY

FC Buxton 8 - 0 Ryan Redfern XI (Duke of York)

A Daymo Sheppard hat-trick inspired FC Buxton to a landslide victory against a Ryan Redfern XI at Fairfield Centre on Saturday morning.

The newly-formed opposition - put together by ex-FCer Redfern - look set to represent the Duke of York pub in next season's Taverners League. Despite displaying a good attitude and commitment to the match throughout, they were no match for an in-form FC side who made it five games unbeaten with a clinical performance.

With several absentees from last week's goalless draw at Halifax, player-manager Taylor managed to get himself a game! Captain Robbie Keane was rested after suffering a calf strain in training on Thursday night (because he was too lazy to warm up), whilst James Staff, clearly disgruntled by the fall in temperatures in his adopted hometown, opted to return to the warmer climates of Plymouth for the weekend. Target-man Kyle Hollins declared himself

unavailable due to a bout of night-shifts and Dangry Gould missed out for the second week in succession, after an argument with the missus the previous night led to him getting KOd. Hard-man image in tatters.

Century man Stuart Corbett dropped to the bench, after last week's emotional 100th appearance left him mentally drained, with a new strike partnership formed up-front as FC's very own 'Fred and Ginger' - Daymo Sheppard (aka Right Said Fred) and Chris Hill (aka The Ginger Whinger) - got the nod in attack.

Helped by student Shaun Francis coming in alongside fellow University of Derby-ers Love and Gilbert, and Dave Bainbridge returning for his sixth appearance of the season, Taylor was able to help out the opposition, who only had 10, by loaning them goalkeeeper Jimmy 'JLS' Wright for the day. FC's starting XI read as follows: Redburn. Betts. A Gould. Moss. Love. Gilbert. Drennan (c). D Bainbridge. Taylor. Sheppard. Hill. Subs were Corbett, Davies and Francis.

With little height in the opposition ranks, it soon became apparent that a key area of the match would be to take advantage of this from set-pieces, an area in which FC have generally struggled in the past. However, take advantage of this they did on Saturday, with three of the first five goals coming from a deal ball.

They got the ball rolling after seven minutes, when Taylor's in-swinging free-kick was met by the head of centre-half Andrew Gould. Gould's first goal since the 4-1 home defeat to Burton Albion in November 2010. 1-0.

The second soon followed from another Taylor delivery, when a low-flying corner from the right was flicked in at the near post by the head of Buxton legend Bainbridge for his third of the season. 2-0.

The floodgates were now open, and 'Fred' was the next on the scoresheet. After being caught offside 17 times in the first 15 minutes, Sheppard adopted a different approach, mugging the opposition defender and carving out a clear route to goal. With the ball bobbling and the bald striker wobbling, it was a relief to see Sheppard get the ball under control at the last minute and finish over the already committed Wright. 3-0.

FC were flying and the fourth goal was perhaps the best of the match. Finding himself in an advanced position, Adam Betts was able whip in a inch-perfect cross onto the head of Sheppard, whose well-timed leap helped him send a looping header over Wright and into the back of the net. 4-0.

It was now damage limitation for Redfern's team, but FC were in an unforgiving mood and soon made it five. Player-manager Taylor made it a hat-trick of assists as Gould again met his corner to grab his second of the match. Goals are like buses... 5-0.

The FC pressure was now relentless and five soon became six, with Sheppard grabbing his hat-trick, albeit in slightly fortuitous circumstances. With the ball played into the box, Sheppard stretched to get a foot on the ball but was met by the advances of Wright in the visitors' net. Neither claimed the ball, however, as it went under Wright's body, allowing Sheppard the easiest of finishes on the other side. 6-0.

HT 6-0.

With the match effectively over as a contest by half-time, Taylor utilised the opportunity to ring the changes. Corbett returned to the centre of the defence in place of Dan Moss, with Stewart Davies replacing the impressive Gilbert on the right side of the FC midfield and Francis making his debut at the expense of hat-trick hero Sheppard, lining up alongside Hill on the FC frontline.

As you could expect given the circumstances, FC began the second period sluggishly, and Taylor encouraged his team to keep the standard high and not let the score slip. The opposition began to get more time on the ball and drove at the FC defence, forcing a handful of corners in the process. Redburn had to be alert on a couple of occasions as he fought to protect what would be his fourth clean sheet of the season.

FC were struggling to exert the same sort of pressure that they had done in the first half, and when the next goal finally came, it was loanee goalkeeper Wright who was on hand with a gift, as his clearance found Bainbridge on the edge of the area, with the veteran midfielder hitting an unstoppable drive into the roof of the net before Wright had time to get back and set himself. 7-0.

After full-back Gareth Love had missed the 'sitter of the match', heading the free-est of headers wide from another Taylor corner, Stewart Davies sealed the victory with a shin-roller which flicked off the end of his right foot and was kindly 'dived over' by the hapless Wright, who was now taking more interest in teaching FC's physio team of Dangry Gould and Robbie Keane his latest JLS dance moves. 8-0.

Clinical FC.

FT 8-0.

More difficult tests will undoubtedly follow, but perhaps just a sign that a more ruthless FC Buxton side is emerging.

Ratings: Redburn 7. Betts 7. Moss 7. A Gould 8. Love 8. Gilbert 8. Drennan 7. D Bainbridge 8. Taylor (insert rating here). Sheppard 9. Hill 8. Subs: Corbett 6. Davies 7. Francis 7. Wright 6.

Manager's MOTM: Daymo Sheppard - a good day for the bald eagle. Took the majority of his chances to record his second FC hat-trick with little over 40 minutes on the clock. Backheel watch = 0. Offside watch = 24.